


NIGHT-SKY OF MY MIND

by SILKCUT



Series: ɪɴꜱᴄʀɪʙᴇᴅ ʙʏ ꜱɪʟᴋᴄᴜᴛ [19]
Category: Legion (TV)
Genre: Character Study, Gen, Inscribed by SILKCUT, Multi, Normal is a Delusion, Other, Twitter Solo Roleplay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-16 06:07:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29077584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SILKCUT/pseuds/SILKCUT
Summary: She might be female, but there are so many things about her that also don’t feel like it at all. It makes things easier then. Hard to share intimate details about your nightmares with a friend if you also want to bang her. So this is good. I have something special and perfect with Lenny.
Relationships: Amahl Farouk | Shadow King/David Haller, Lenore "Lenny" Busker & David Haller
Series: ɪɴꜱᴄʀɪʙᴇᴅ ʙʏ ꜱɪʟᴋᴄᴜᴛ [19]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2132040
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

**ﾒ**

Ｄａｖｉｄ Ｃｈａｒｌｅｓ Ｈａｌｌｅｒ

**ﾒ**

* * *

## Ｌｏａｄｅｄ， ｌｏａｔｈｉｎｇ，

## ｔｉｎｙ ρℓαgυєѕ

##  **༻✧**

I am alone and it's pitch black. That's how it always starts.  
  
But the silence is just a short reprieve because I'll hear them next, as loud as a gunshot, perforating through the vacuum.  
  
These voices have hands, and the hands have sharp nails. They drag me down until I’m burrowed deeply into what feels like someone else’s skin.  
  
I often get the sense too that I’m nothing more than a decaying protoplasm that’s draped across a body that’s never going to be my own.  
  
And it hurts. Then it makes me angry.  
  
So I scream until I can’t even hear myself do that anymore.  
  
“That’s when I wake up,” I finish my somber little narrative and glance sideways at Lenny. She’s staring back at me, doing that thing of hers where she alternates between smiling too much or not at all.  
  
The drab walls of the ward surrounding us have a color I want to say is green, but I don’t trust even my own simple assessment of colors these days. Besides, it won’t matter. Management can splash the walls with rainbows for all the fat luck that would do for any of us.  
  
What was it that Lenny told me on my first month here?  
  
‘ We’re ɴoтнιɴɢ вυт cυѕтoмιzed plαɢυeѕ тнαт нαve тo вe coɴтαιɴed. So тнey pυмp oυr ѕyѕтeм ғυll oғ pιllѕ αɴd υɴĸɴowιɴɢly leαve oυr нeαrтѕ loαded wιтн loαтнιɴɢ αɴd reɢreт. ’  
  
God, she’s ever wise and poetic—a mental patient, sure, but she just gets things, man.  
  
She’s also my only friend. I don’t know if she could understand whenever I ramble on like this, but she listens at least. I know she does because she’s posing questions next, but not before she leans close and starts playing with my hair.  
  
“Do the hands grab at your crotch too?” she quips while her fingers rake through my scalp in both careless abandon and disconcerting precision. “Do you think they wanna try doing bad things that you’ll end up enjoying, kid?”  
  
“What bad things?” I knit my eyebrows together in confusion though I have a fair idea what she’s trying to imply.  
  
“Oh, you know,” Lenny’s fingers now glide downwards to my left cheek. The gesture so absentminded and can even be mistaken for tender is something very Lenny-like, as well as her remarking, “…finger your anus, play you like a fiddle.”  
  
Anyone would have winced and found the commentary repulsive, but I laugh it off because anything she says or does is always a mix of cute, benign and honest.  
  
“I haven’t met anybody who likes to insert anal play into chitchat as much as you do,” I smile as if that’s meant to compliment her before I rest my temple on the ledge of the couch she and I are perched on.  
  
“Dude,” The gleam in Lenny’s eyes is unmistakable, “You didn’t even answer me. So they did try some bad things on you, didn’t they?”  
  
“Nothing like you imagine,” My eyelids are fluttering shut in spite of myself, but I keep going, “It just seemed as if they want to tear me to shreds and feed me to myself afterwards, if that even makes sense.”  
  
“Yeah, no, bro, I dig that,” Lenny swings her leg over my lap, “Self-cannibalization and autoerotic asphyxiation. Deepthroating objects until you’re puking last night’s dinner.”  
  
“What?” I chuckle far too giddily than I expected as my eyes remain shut, “I didn’t mean any of those things at all, Lenny. What I was trying to say is that they’re trying to take me out, you know. Their nails were these hooks and they pushed deep into the vein—” I blindly reach forward and wrap my hand on what I guess was her shoulder, “—like when an eagle snatches prey.”  
  
“I think those are called talons, dude,” Lenny pinches my nose once then flicks her fingers on it, ever the eternal woman-child she is. “And take you out from what?”  
  
“Right, whatever, talons,” I open my eyes to look into her hazel ones before I go on expounding, “I’m not really sure, but I think they want to push my soul out of my body. It’s like…” I trail off so I can look over my shoulder at the nurses’ station. And then I look back at Lenny and whisper, “…тнey wαɴт мe тo relιɴqυιѕн owɴerѕнιp ѕo тнey cαɴ owɴ everyтнιɴɢ ιɴ мe.”  
  
“Like your balls?” Lenny rubs her calf on my crotch, and I almost wince due to the unexpected warmth from the contact before I reminded myself at the last second that this is so like her to catch me off-guard with a meaningless touch. “Shrunk them to fit in dainty hands like those metal thingies people use to relieve stress,” she adds, cackling. What a goof.  
  
Lenny starts petting my hair again and then kisses my nose before blowing a raspberry at me, spraying spit on my face.   
  
Oh, Lenny.  
  
She might be female, but there are so many things about her that also don’t feel like it at all. It makes things easier then. Hard to share intimate details about your nightmares with a friend if you also want to bang her. So this is good. I have something special and perfect with Lenny.  
  
With a grin, I tell her, “Yeah, like my balls and everything else. Probably my guts and kidneys too. I’m not really sure why this latest delusion included these phantoms trying to harvest my organs but since when do delusions make rational sense, right?”  
  
“Delusions are the fetish of a starving mind,” Lenny utters and then removes her leg from my lap so she could stretch it towards the table before us. A few magazines get crumpled underneath the weight. Her other leg swipes across the other objects on the table as well, and they tumble noiselessly down the carpeted floor; a scattered mess of trivial things.  
  
I really had nothing to say to her comment, so I start poking her thigh. She’s not ticklish anyway. In response, she sinks further into the couch and then uses the back of her hand to slap me repeatedly on the chest, all so she can give herself something to do.  
  
It’s nice like this when me and Lenny do nothing and talk about everything that don’t really mean a damn thing. Out of instinct, I huddle even closer to her, overcome with the sudden need for her warmth. Life here in the ward makes more sense than what’s out there. Like with Lenny, for example. We can say anything weird aloud and know neither of us would scoff nor label the other a freak.  
  
We’ve both been called enough of that our entire lives already.  
  
“Now you get it, kid,” she pipes up.  
  
I shot her a look, “What was that?”  
  
“I’m not going anywhere,” she says in a hushed whisper, pressing her lips a few inches close to mine as I stay frozen in place, anticipating a kiss I know will never come nor want anyway.  
  
“I never said I wanted you to go,” I answer with a hint of baffled hesitation in my tone. “What are you even talking about?”  
  
Lenny slaps me on the knee once then stands back to her feet before whirling around to press her arms on either side of the couch, entrapping me as she does.  
  
“Wanna get high with me?” she offers.  
  
“Uh, I think the medication here is supposed to not get us high, Lenny.”  
  
“Not those stupid things!” She scrunches her face and grabs both my hands now, “We drink from the toad, remember? The toad’s waiting!”  
  
Before I could ask any more questions, she’s pulling me out of the communal area and into the looming, empty hallways of the facility. And then I start chasing her for some reason, but she’s already in a far-away distance. That makes me sad, inexplicably so, before the fear sets in. Lenny looks over her shoulder then and slyly mocks me to catch her like she’s confident as all hell that I never will.  
  
Maybe she’s right. I can already feel the muscles on my legs and calves straining, and as soon as I collapse on the ground, a familiar pattern greets me. This carpet—it’s not the same one as before. I feel Lenny’s hands grabbing at my chest. I panic, recognizing that I might be dreaming and it’ll soon be pitch-black again. I’ll be alone. The voices will take over. And they’re going to eat me until not even my soul is spared.  
  
“Relax, kid,” Lenny’s hot breath is upon my ear from the moment we land next to one another on the ground of my old apartment. Tendrils of smoke from the drugs she burned conceal the otherwise moldy scent of the entire place. I caught a glimpse of broken plates and cupboards and shelves ripped from their hinges. That was in the kitchen area. I seem to recall standing in the middle of its devastation a while back. But how long has it been since?  
  
“Why are we here?” I mumble but can’t hear my voice too well. I feel weak and feverish all of a sudden too. “Aren’t we…aren’t we supposed to be—?”  
  
Lenny doesn’t let me finish and shoves the ceramic toad on my face. I inhale sharply, allowing the drugs to pass through my airway easily. I relax soon enough. The nerve endings on my mouth feel like rubber, loosening my jaw until all I could do is just lie there with my mouth slightly hanging open. I feel so stuffed, even as my mind rebels to accept the false comfort which cocoons me as if this is what love must feel like—taste like.  
  
“Ready for that circle jerk?” Lenny presses the back of her head on my chest then rubs her spine all over me like a cat in heat. I can’t move or think. I want to say something, but the words are plucked from my grasp the moment I think about attempting coherence.  
  
Still writhing against me, Lenny laughs and recites more mumbo jumbo, “Isn’t this a good fit, kid? You, me and the rest of the world fading away as we ride to the distant sunset.”  
  
I feel her toss and turn at first before she flips her body so she could sit on top of me this time. I don’t like the way Lenny is staring down at me. Am I even a person to her? What can she see that’s making her smirk like that?  
  
“The sky is always so beautiful during sunset, David. So much orange and pink. And the purple streaks remind me of bruises on flesh. Abuse and anarchy on skin.”  
  
She slaps me. “Hey! Don’t pass out on me, you asshole!” Lenny then grinds her hips, and the friction between us grows too much that I begin to feel nauseous and perhaps—for the first time—fully becoming insane. “Kid, look at me! I’m connecting with you. Don’t ruin this for me, okay? I’m doing gay stuff and you’re not even thankful.”  
  
“Who are you?” I manage to speak at last.  
  
“Never mind!” Lenny stops moving on top of me and pinches my cheeks instead. “Let’s do something else. To people. Just to prove we can be unstoppable together.”  
  
“Who—” With some struggle, I sit up and push her off me, “—the fucking fuck are you?”  
  
“I’m your friend,” she slips out of my lap and gives a ready smile, exaggerating her pep, “I’m Cornflakes. Busker with the small tities. You call me Lenny.”  
  
“Lenny’s dead!” I shout it out, but all that comes out is a hoarse declaration. The room is becoming hotter as bile rises to my throat. I almost did hurl while my eyes frantically search for a door, any door, so I can break free from this delusion.  
  
The fake-Lenny grins wider. It looks so wrong in her fake face. “Don’t make it hard, David. Seriously, a boner would be a total mood-killer for me right now.”  
  
“BLOW ME!” I toss the ceramic toad at her but miss. It hits the opposite wall instead, shattering without a sound. The shards simply fell like petals, and it was almost beautiful if it wasn't also freaky as all fuck.  
  
“I told you I don’t swing that way, bro," fake-Lenny stares and stares and stares until her eyes look like yellow orbs. Demon's eyes.  
  
“What is this? Where am I?” I grip the nearest thing next to me so I can slowly get up, all while my knees wobble and threaten to break. I had to keep clinging onto a chair just to keep steady.  
  
“David, David, David!” She slithers back on the ground and crawls towards me. “I thought you wanna get high with me. What’s the matter?”  
  
“This isn’t real. Don’t come any closer! I’m warning you…” I attempt to flee but that proved to be a fatal mistake because I end up stumbling back to the floor just in time as fake-Lenny catches up and tries to straddle me again. I fight back as hard as I could and scratch her on the cheek. Blood gushes through the wound, dripping to her upper lip. She licks it for show and grins.  
  
“What are you going to do to me, kid, huh?” Fake-Lenny starts scratching me back. but her hands are not the same. They are twisted, ugly fingers that have a sickly, greenish yellow color. I scream and try to cover my face by raising my arms up, but she shreds through the flesh and marrow anyway, undeterred and relentless.  
  
I’m all alone, here in the pitch black. That's how it always starts.  
  
Then come the voices and then the hands; and the hands have sharp nails. They drag me down until I’m burrowed deeply into what feels like someone else’s skin.  
  
And it hurts. Then it makes me angry.  
  
So I scream until I can’t even hear myself do that anymore.  
  
“That’s when I wake up,” I scoop the last of my meds from the cup and stare at their nondescript appearance. As soon as I lift my gaze, I meet Dr. Kissinger’s calm expression. He hasn’t jotted anything else on his clipboard and is merely content watching me speak, at least for the time being.  
  
I glance sideways until my eyes find Lenny. She’s sitting next to me among the group, and she’s had her headphones on to mute everything else in the session. Her hands jive along to the music that could be playing or has been imaginary all this time.  
  
“It sounds as if the dream hasn’t ended at all, David,” Dr. Kissinger remarks. “Do you think it’s still going on, right at this moment?”  
  
“I don’t know,” I lie. I want to answer with an affirmative, but I can’t even do that. I don’t trust myself to be strong enough about my convictions especially when it comes to my sanity, or a lack thereof.  
  
“Take your pills, David,” the therapist requests with a mild tone, the one he always uses to indicate that everything is always okay, “You’re going to feel so much better after it. I promise.”  
  
I offer a fleeting smile and did exactly what he asked. Beside me, Lenny leans closer, her breath warming my ear again as she utters, “Everyoɴe αroυɴd нere ĸɴowѕ тнαт prιѕoɴ ιѕ нoмe. Aɴd yoυ’re leαrɴιɴɢ тo love yoυrѕ.”  
  
She puckers her lips and makes kissy noises before withdrawing, so pleased with herself. I just lean back on the chair and let the meds do their thing  
  
I am alone. It is always pitch-black inside me, save the few moments of lucidity that I never get to hold on to for long. Oh, how I'd give anything to have some stars shine through the night-sky of my mind.   
  
At least I have Lenny. She's my only friend.

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**ﾒ**

**[@RHYMESWITHPERIL](https://twitter.com/rhymeswithperil) **

**ﾒ**

* * *


	2. Chapter 2

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**ﾒ**

Ｄａｖｉｄ Ｃｈａｒｌｅｓ Ｈａｌｌｅｒ

**ﾒ**

* * *

## Yσυя νεяч σшп ｗａｌｋｉｎｇ，

## ｔａｌｋｉｎｇ ᖴ ᙀ ᑎ ᘜ ᙀ S

##  **༻✧**

You were ѕмιттεи.  
  
Even before you saw and got to know him later on, you knew he was yours—could have been if he only shared your ambition and wasn’t held down by...what were they called again? Right—мσяαlѕ _._  
  
What you clearly had was a collision between two unmistakable phenomena. Surely he had recognized an equal in spite of his misgivings, but oh, he broke your heart instead when he was quick to cast you aside like you’re nothing more than an afterthought. The fool was far too short-sighted, which was a pity, really. You and he could have ruled the world, but he was so concerned about changing hearts and turning the tides to achieve peace and harmony. 

What would be the point of something so dreadfully impossible when you can just flip switches and twist the gears, one vulnerable human mind at a time?  
  
Because you have a knack for that, don’t you—the taking of a person and then afterwards you’d modify and annihilate their core. That’s your favorite thing, rivaled only by long, introspective walks across the astral plane (that one gets old though; it’s always better to have someone nearby whose nightmares you can feast on). That’s you, αиd чσυ’яε αωεѕσмε. But alas, you made a boo-boo and formed a silly crush on some other telepath who acted like he’s the second-coming of Gandhi or some shit. His sympathies aimed for the betterment of lives were, at best misguided and, quite frankly, very υи-ƒυи.  
  
Using your powers to help people? That’s _so_ not you. And you need to stay true to yourself because at the end of the day, you need to live with your choices. Besides, hoarding the power all to your fine and beautiful self has proven to work so much better in the long run anyway, so why even bother?  
  
But he has tried to make you see that you both could do some good in this world, and it was because of his meddling and the fact that he started imposing his own views, that whatever warm and fuzzy feelings you felt for this ιdισт slowly hardened into fierce loathing.  
  
And so you had a squabble. It didn’t end well for either of you, but you got the worse deal; seeing as the idiot ripped your physical body apart and scattered your consciousness across the astral plane.  
  
The fucking jerk.  
  
Your only consolation was the fact that you are ѕтιll powerful—tremendously powerful—that you were able to navigate the alternate plane of existence long enough to find a way back to him. He was so careless and overconfident about his victory that he led you straight to what would turned out to be a most coveted prize. When you first laid your eyes on that, it was yet another instant earthquake of attraction; but this time you’ll do away with free will and consent.  
  
This time you’ll justｔａｋｅ.

## ➷

YOᑌᖇS was how you called the protégé David.  
  
YOᑌᖇS implied absolute control and possession. He was your living host and, whether you accept it or not, what you have been reduced to without any physical form for the time being is a parasite. And so here’s David—YOᑌᖇ David—and soon his body will be YOᑌᖇS too. For now, you satisfy your many cravings by exploiting his brain. You latch onto the juiciest parts of the memories and sensory impressions and give his world a tumble and a spin. An abundant source of fears and anxiety attacks, David never disappoints at all. And so for the best part of his childhood and a quarter of his adulthood, you feasted on him.  
  
Poor kid doesn’t even have to be known by anything else but YOᑌᖇS. You made sure he knew it too, no matter how well you had cloaked yourself inside his mind just to keep feeding the illusion of what the doctors had diagnosed as ‘schizophrenia,’. Ha! That was an ironic twist, if not somewhat accurate. 

Either way, David’s screwed. He’s going to live in the fringes of society forever until he gives up his sense of agency and only then can you gain full control of his body. There’s always going to be that tiny part of David that knows he is clαιмεd already, but just like his idiot father, his telepathic abilities are strong. It’s up to you to guarantee that he will never be aware of such raw power and how truly capable he is, especially if he ever tried to ƒιgнт вαcк _._ Best not have that bullshit.  
  
He had a family though (adoptive folks and big sister), so having him all to yourself had not been the smoothest of transitions. But he is YOᑌᖇS, and anything that could be detriment to that relationship needed to be plucked out as soon as possible. It was easy to isolate David once the prognosis of his craziness became official until the only person left whom he hasn’t truly alienated was his sister Amy. Pretty, gullible and guilt-ridden Amy who thinks visiting her brother in the mental facility their parents stashed him away in would appease the secrets that make her ache at night. What a hoot, that Amy.  
  
In the mental ward, David made only one friend. She’s this junkie who has low impulse control and is never going to be a functional human being, but that made her endearing and a natural fit to David’s own neurosis and paranoia—two qualities you heightened because they’re pretty much the food source that gives you strength. The girl’s name is Lenny, and she’s essentially harmless. You’ve actually taken a shine on her too. You’d watch David interact with her often and find yourself wondering what it would be like to live inside her brain. But that won’t work, seeing as she’s no telepath or displayed any latent mutant capabilities. Using her as a host will tear her apart. So you remained there in the darkest part of David’s psyche instead and began to amuse yourself by mimicking Lenny.  
  
One time you made David dream of you as Lenny. You two were holding hands by a nearby dock of a polluted swamp. David was afraid to jump and swim the dirty waters, but you’ve been egging him to do it just to prove that he can be made to do things. Wearing Lenny’s familiar face certainly helps.  
  
“Come on, kid,” you jeered as you pulled him by the hand with as little force as possible so he wouldn’t start resisting, “The water’s warm. I think you’re going to enjoy the splash. Nothin’ to be scared of, alright? Here, I’ll come with you. Ready?”  
  
“It doesn’t look safe at all,” David withdrew his hand from your grasp and took a few steps back whilst his eyes remain fixed on the depths below. The nausea and anxiety in the boy deliciously mingle together, and you feel them immensely because you’re of one mind, one soul. It’s electrifying to be this intimate especially with the son of a man you loathed.  
  
“Stop being such a chicken shit and jump, Davey!” you started pushing him on the back and he squirmed away just in time as he lost his footing and half-collapsed on the wooden planks. He looked ridiculous!  
  
“Are you crazy!” he had nothing else to hold onto but you, and the utter look of horror and desperation in his expression merely made you convulse in laughter.  
  
“Kid, we’re both crazy, remember?” you wrapped both arms around the poor kid so you can help him stand back on his feet. He grasped his hands around your elbows and didn’t let go. And then David’s focus shifted to your face—with the Lenny mask ever-so-perfectly in place—and you could sense that it was only because he believes that you are indeed his drug-addled friend that made him instinctively stay put. That level of trust was almost impossible for David these days. Everyone he had ever cared about before he was sent to the institution had betrayed him in some way, and you relished on this.  
  
Daddy Idiot gave him away for adoption. His adoptive shit parents gave up on him once he was clinically diagnosed, and dumb Amy visits the ward only once a month. And every time she sees David sitting across the glass from her, the unmistakable pity and guilt in those sad brown eyes made it seem as if she’s a child in a war newsreel, the minutiae flashes of devastation flickering over her face while she remained helpless about it all. You would have delighted on the fact that she was such a sad dumpling if it wasn’t also insulting. She acted as if she’s the one locked up in a loony bin and not David.  
  
What a pandering whore.  
  
Okay, so perhaps you can get protective of your host too. After all, living inside him for almost thirty years meant that the passages of his brain function and the sensations of his very soul become jumbled together with what little humanity you have left, and that makes it a sorry pain in the ass to tell sometimes where David ends and you begin.  
  
And when you make him dream of you like this—each time you manifest while wearing the face of a loved one or his imaginary pet dog from childhood or that cartoonish evil Angry Boy from a storybook his adoptive dad used to read—a part of you can admit it’s because you desire to be more connected to David than just the parasitic kind. He was nothing and everything to you all at once; a toy and a cherished pet; a disaster of your own making and a puzzle you need to figure out faster than he could do it for himself. 

Possession can work both ways, it seems.

Maybe David owns you too?

Nah!  
  
“Let’s count to three,” you kept your arms wrapped around David as you guide him to the edge of the dock. His gaze kept shifting between you and the awaiting abyss below, but he said nothing and just gripped at your forearms so tightly that if you were made of real flesh, you bet you’ll feel his nails burrow deep.  
  
“One,” you stepped closer with your left foot and waited for David to do the same.  
  
“Two,” you took two quick steps forward all of a sudden, and David let out a small whimper as he stiffened in your grasp. He stared wide-eyed at you now, begging you not to make him do this.  
  
You grinned and mouthed, “three”. And that’s when you released the boy so you can plunge first into the vile swamp. David screamed and tried to reach for you, but he was too late. You faced him as you fell, smiling like you’re anticipating that a literal bed of roses would catch and cradle you.  
  
And then it had gone dark after that, all because David woke up.

What a chicken shit! And just when things were about to get interesting too.

The truth was David was your one reliable anchor in these tumultuous seas of the astral plane. You're still weak especially without a corporeal form, but someday soon you'll regain enough powers that you can hijack David on a more permanent basis and show this sad boy what it's like to be God. 

You bet his sweet ass that you can give God a run for his money. Besides, you already know that David is nothing like his father, and so that means he'll be easier to bend to your whims. There's no one else for him anyway. It's just you and you ain't packing up and leaving, that's for sure.

Together. Or not at all.

This is all you're going to offer David once you reveal yourself to him sans the Lenny mask. Not the striving and the friendships and the insane pursuit of happiness. 

But ρσɯҽɾ.

Unbeknownst to you, the thirty years worth of work you put in is about to get unravelled.

It starts with a bitch named Sydney Barrett, and the audacity she had to offer David ʅσʋҽ.

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**ﾒ**

**[@RHYMESWITHPERIL](https://twitter.com/rhymeswithperil) **

**ﾒ**

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